When I see my boss drunk
- Me every night: I can have exactly 7 hours 23 minutes and 48 seconds of sleep if I fall asleep right now.
my love is like a candle, if you forget me, i will burn your fucking house down
People mistake ovulation and menstruation to be the same thing when in fact they aren’t
Ovulation is when the eggs are saying “hello friends I am here”
And menstuation is when the eggs are saying “goodbye friends I am gone”
“Goodbye friends I am gone” and then proceeds to rip the wallpaper from the walls.
BEST SASS FROM THE BBMA’S THIS YEAR!!!!
When someone says something bad about me
In high school: